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One of the worst symptoms of Endometriosis, would have to be the painful sex we get with it! It is just like a total slap in the face! I mean really…. do we want to test our relationships any more than the emotional ups and downs, the anger outbursts and the “can’t do much today cos I am sore” moments? Now, we add painful sex to the mix and it is like we have a perfect list of ingredients, sure to test any relationship!
So, I figured out a few little things, that have helped me to enjoy sex without as much pain and sometimes even pain free! I know these techniques are not going to work for everyone and I know some of us, unfortunately have pain no matter what but hey, they might help at least ease things a little.
Timing is everything
There are better times of the month to have sex. I personally have found the time after ovulation and before my monthly to be the best time. Test the best time for you – some girls say the best time is before ovulation. By recording your cycle and knowing what your body is doing when, you can work out what time is least painful for you and aim to “have fun” during those times.
Are you ready?
This is a little graphic and detailed but it does need a mention. I know if I rush the actual initial insertion part, my insides squeeze much more and I also tighten up more. I find that if I wait and enjoy the moment and don’t rush things,I get much less endo pain from sex. If you have ever had sex when you drink you can understand this point a heap more – you simply relax into it more and naturally experience less pain in the process.
Get everything out before hand
Well…. go to the toilet. You want to reduce as much pressure down there as possible. I find this helps heaps and also avoids any bladder infections popping up!
Pick the least painful positions
This is kinda a given but naturally we want to reduce any positions that involve anything “too deep”. I believe this varies depending on where your endo sits but for me, the deep stuff hurts the most.
Drink a glass of water afterwards and go to the toilet again
This is just a precautionary for the bladder inflammation and potential infection again.
Do a basic Yoga pose afterwards
Yoga ensures natural blood flow and this basic pose will help release any pressure build up. The position is called Baddha Konasana (Cobbler’s pose)
- Sit on the floor with your legs stretched out,- Inhale and exhale then while exhaling bring your feet close to your groin and push the sole of your feet against each other,- Hold to your toes and when exhaling try to lower your knees to the ground as much as you can,- Hold this pose for about 3-5 minutes while slowly inhaling and exhaling.You can also lie down and do this pose, making sure you support the knees.Though many of these points will help you reduce the pain during sex, they are only “helping”. Ultimately, we still need to heal the body to totally get rid of pain during sex – a true test of success at healing the body from Endo!
Have you found any techniques that have worked for you? Anything you feel like sharing on the topic?
Author of
Cure Endometriosis &
Eating with Mel.
Melissa, I love this!! I find that my pain comes and goes. I could have a great month and then the next month be telling my partner “no way it hurts too much!!!”
I think the key to this is knowing your limits and communicating that with your partner. They will understand!
These are great tips, especially the get everything out beforehand (especially the bowel, it may adhered to the pouch of Douglas) and the pick your least painful position. The timing is very true as well.
I love sex & Yes while I have painful sex sometimes, I’m not about to let this control my life.
Thanks Samantha and welcome!
It certainly makes you closer to your partner too 
Totally agree – know your limits and communicate heaps
I am so happy to find this blog. I have been feeling so alone in this silent fight with endometriosis. Painful sex is the worst part of it all! It is really causing a lot of strain on my marriage. I got married 2 years ago and was a virgin. Imagine my whole sexual experience has been very negative. The pain is incredible and it has taken a great emotional and psychological toll on me. I have withdrawn from my hubby and now he has done the same from me. Depression sets in when your relationship is in shambles because of an illness no one really knows about or understands….it’s a lonely life….
I appreciate the blogs I have found, so that I don’t feel so isolated in my silent suffering.
It does get better Feliz
It will be okay and just love eachother outside of the bedroom. Kisses and hugs go a long way!
having sex make me more sick? Or will it make the endometriosis bigger?should l stop sex?
I can’t imagine it making your endometriosis grow faster. It might actually create some blood flow through the area, which would be a good thing, to avoid excessive stagnation. Enjoy
One of the worst symptoms of Endometriosis, would have to be the painful sex we get with it! It is just like a total slap in the face! I mean really…. do we want to test our relationships any more than the emotional ups and downs, the anger outbursts and the “can’t do much today cos I am sore” moments? Now, we add painful sex to the mix and it is like we have a perfect list of ingredients, sure to test any relationship!