Sometimes I feel so wrapped up in myself and my own issues with Endometriosis. I feel like it is all about me and my Endo. It is like everything is not working to help me and that everything is extra hard because of it. It is a selfish and self consuming place. A place where we just want everyone to recognise us and our issues and no-one seems to, so we become more self focused and alone. It is loneliness far beyond just being alone as often we are surrounded by many friends and family that do really care about us but it is lonely because though they can sympathise, they often just don’t really know or can relate to how we really feel.
They don’t get that we just feel unsettled or emotional. They don’t get that we get sore when we’re tense about something or that we can suddenly feel like we need to get away from a situation, in a mad sort of panic.
It is all about us. Our Endo and damn it, why doesn’t anyone understand?
We are being selfish now….. we are becoming too self focused. This is being totally wrapped up in ourselves. We focus so much on our own needs and our pain and our this or that, that we completely forget that those around us are actually struggling too. We become so wrapped up in everything to do with Endo that we fail to see that others might be going through their own issues or having other things going on. This is where we are being selfish. We fail to look outside ourselves and recognise that there is actually a world outside of our own scary place.
The funny thing is, if we are able to get out of this selfish stage. This obsessive and often negative place…. then we can really find that it makes us feel a whole lot better about our lives and our situation – kinda ironic.
Thing is, helping others and opening yourself up to others actually makes you feel far less alone, even if it has no correlation to Endo at all. There are so many people out there with all sorts of problems, so many things that we just don’t consider or allow ourselves to realise. We are so focused on our own world that we don’t open ourselves to different realities where Endo is not everything or controls everything.
I often try and help people. This is something I simply enjoy doing – hence this blog 
. Thing is, we can help people or influence people in such simple and easy ways. It can just be a little joke said to a teller at a supermarket or cracking a joke at a person at work. Smile at people and acknowledge those around you. You will be amazed at how easily you can actually change someone day or situation just by little things.
Thing is, you can take it a step further and do bigger things. Bigger things will make all the more difference to someone. Listen to someone when they express an issue or help someone when they are in strife. Now, I know you are going to assume this needs to be financial but it really isn’t financial that gives you the most reward. I find helping people through motivation and helping people reach their true potential makes me feel fantastic.
There is a saying: “Do for others what you wish for yourself”. So, if you want to feel sexy and beautiful, make others feel sexy and beautiful.
Open up other people’s worlds. Ask them how they are. Acknowledge how someone else might be feeling. Recognise that there are other things going on and look at them. Notice them and see how your words or physical help could benefit them.
This is especially important when you consider those that are close to you. We often loose sight at how much those around you do for us. You can do small things for them that can make them feel special and loved, even if you can’t physically or financially do anything. A hand massage or making some tea or coffee without being asked. Just little things.
Give and you will feel so much better about yourself and your own situation.
Endometriosis is a horrible condition. We know this but we also know that there are many emotions attached to endo. Don’t get into a rut about Endo though. Allow yourself to still give to those around you and acknowledge that Endo might be hard but that there are others who are also in a struggle.
Doing something for someone else takes the focus off yourself. It also gives you some feeling of power to give back.
We have so many more elements to us, outside of Endo. Don’t let Endo dominate everything about our lives!
Author of Cure Endometriosis & Eating with Mel.
